If this is the first time you are visiting our blog click here to read how we got started on this journey.







Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Attachment

We are so glad to have Moriah and Silas home. Many of you have asked how we are doing...We are doing well! It is so hard to believe that our kiddos have been home for a little over three weeks now. We are slowly getting settled in and learning about each other. Moriah and Silas are both sleeping and eating wonderful. They are both healthy and doing well.
The journey to where we are now was long, but we are glad to have made it!
The challenging part now is "attachment." Before beginning this journey, I had no idea what that meant. And really even as we read and watched videos to prepare for the arrival of our children, it was a foreign concept. You see, the hard part in adopting is for the child to become attached to their new family. Both of our children are old enough that they have a past and memories. But they also have no real concept of what it means to be in a family, to be loved and to have someone always there for them. The goal we have now is to teach them that... to reassure them that we will be their forever family. Just think, they were brought to us from halfway around the globe. They do not understand what we are saying and their whole world is brand new, there is nothing familiar.
As many of you know, we are not taking the children to class at church and we are also asking that people not hold or pick them up. That sounds so very strange to someone not in our shoes, it sounded strange to us before we were here. Many of you have asked why we are doing things this way.
Think about a child you know, they walk away from their mommy and daddy and see a new person. They stop and look at the new face and in caution then wander back to mom and dad. Or imagine a little one who stumbles and falls. They begin to cry and reach for mommy or daddy. Well our two new precious ones at this point would not necessarily react that way. They will reach for ANYONE. They will let anyone, stranger or family pick them up. They will climb into anyone's lap. At first, that seems so great- they are so friendly- but the opposite is actually true. They don't know any better.
So, while all this may seem strange or foreign- we are trying to do what is best for our children. It is hard to have two precious ones that you love so very much, but who at this point have no connection back to you. It is our hope through much intentionality, through caution, through prayer and time that our children will realize we love them and are there for them- FOREVER!!
Please pray for our family as God is continuing to knit us together. Pray for Moriah and Silas to attach to us. Pray for wisdom for us as we make decisions regarding what is best for them. And please be patient... one day they will be ready to be picked up and held:)

1 comment:

  1. great explanation carrie! it is such a tough concept to understand and communicate. you are doing a great job! look forward to seeing your whole family sometime soon!

    ReplyDelete